FUCK YOU, WASHU

In honor of our upcoming fifth year reunion, I feel compelled to say a few words:

I liked WashU when I graduated in '04. I did, really. I felt the school gave me a good education and gave me a nice break from the Philly Guido scene. I even went to bat for WashU's annual giving, getting involved in this bullshit Young Alumni PaceSetter Program (YAPP) founded by a certain classmate. The goal of YAPP was for the class of '04 to have its own independent alumni group which would collect donations and help the class network. This group was designed to co-exist with the administration's own group. We did the usual donation stuff- have meetings, contact people, make banners, talk about how cool we were at Vanderbilt, and that sort of thing.

Then about 3 years ago the school administration swooped in and dissolved YAPP. I don't know why this happened- no one ever explained it to me- it wasn't worth their time to do that. But I put alot of time into YAPP, and its unexplained dissolution was assinine.

So fast forward to the present, because there is no time like the present. I am getting 4-5 calls per week from a 314 number seeking donations. I never answer it because I am afraid what I would say would probably get me locked up.

And now these boners in our administration are planning a fifth year reunion. I blew a shitload of money going there for 3 years, and it will cost a lot to go back for a weekend. And I really love how WashU is trying to get in on the fun and nickel and dime attendees. Here are some selected "events:"

"10/23/09 Welcome Back Happy Hour- $10 per person, including wine, beer and snacks. "
Welcome back my ass. I fly halfway across the country and pay out my ass for a hotel room, and then I get hit with this $10 door charge. From WashU's perspective, the $10 charge is nominal and does not add up. It is just a disrespectful, petty surcharge. If you treat alums with respect and have a free event, your donations will increase. If not, I think your campus should be strafed.

"10/24/09 Fun St. Louis Locations for Young Alumni- Cost is $45 per person and includes dinner, wine and a cash bar."
Get the fuck out of here. First, there are no fun locations in St. Louis. Second, no one who has been out of law school 5 years or more is young. We have lost our youth and it is not coming back. And third, how can the cost include a "cash bar?" From what I understand, drinks at a cash bar are not free, so you would need to use some form of currency (ie "cash") to get the drinks. These fuckers.

"10/25/09 Bistro Box Lunch- $10 per person, includes sandwich, chips, cookie and a beverage"
This is a great one- about a 100% mark-up for a meal you can get at the St. Louis Bread Co. But I mean that free cookie is a nice bonus I guess.

So where does this leave me? Well, I returned the invite (it had prepaid postage on it) and left them an anonymous message telling them to go to hell. I am not going to the reunion and I doubt it is even worth my time to shell it. And as for you a-holes, well you can do whatever you want.